Confessor

Love : Ned advice

do guys like it when their girlfriend texts first or nah? I been trying to figure out if I should text him first or not or what....I mean I guess I don't want to sound too much, u Kno ..

Love : Scared of love

I feel I'm scared to be a relationship rightnow...even tho he says he loves me and shows it...idk what to do but tear up honestly

Family : Sorrow

I used my grandmas credit card more than she can afford and now I feel terrible and bad about doing what I did

Family : Sorrow

I used my grandmas credit card more than she can afford and now I feel terrible and bad about doing what I did

General : Лучшие идеи бизнеса и заработка

Это хороший сайт

General : mother in law

My MIL lost her driver license temporary due to her drinking. She is single working at a law firm, she dressed very nicely to work. I have no choice but to give her a ride to and from work on my way to my workplace. I said to her one morning she was looking hot seeing her get me arouse every day. She said thank you, she will repay me for what I am doing. She called me over one weekend telling her daughter she had broken toilet and water is every where. When I got there she open the door with just her silk robe on guided me to the bedroom pretend to show me the leaking toilet. I was surprise she drop her robe as soon as we walk into her bedroom. She said the toilet is fine she just wanted me to come over for some fun. I said is this how you repay me and she shook her head. Well you all guessed what happen next. One thing I can say is she is a lot better in bed than my wife. We keep this as a secret for months even when she got her license back we still do it.

General : I am around 5 months clean from cutting and I don’t know if I can keep up much longer.

I know that when I get sad, it’s something I have to get over eventually. But recently I realized that my friends of 4-5 years have been intentionally leaving me behind, not inviting me and counting me out. I cried upon finding this out, at the birthday party of a friend in our circle. Another friend talked me down and I told her it was fine, that I understood, and that I didn’t know why I burst into tears so suddenly. The rest of my friends avoided me the whole night, maybe because the crying was embarrassing. Before this, I have been at my best state mentally. I was the happiest and the most productive. Bad things happened here and there, but I was at peace enough not to let those things bother me. Strange how one occurrence, one night at a party, is enough to tip it all off. Suddenly it all bothers me. I was bothered again by how I was friendless at my current school for 2 years (different from the schools of my aforementioned friends). No one to walk with home. No one to go to school with. No one to eat lunch with or talk to during break time. No one wants to hang out with me for longer than 5 minutes. I am suddenly distraught by thoughts of self doubt again. Was it my economic status? (Those friends are very rich, even the previously mentioned birthday party was covered in a news article. I can’t even afford going to a good private university.) Was it because I did not go to a top school? Am I too much? Am I not enough? I am slowly coming to an acceptance, that maybe I cannot be to them how they are to me, but it is just sad. I don’t think I have anyone else. I feel like my lack of peer support is contributing to the detriment of my mental health. It is lonely, both at school and at home. Anywhere I go in my free time, I am always alone. It has been this way ever since I’ve entered my current school. (This is why my old friends mattered so much to me even though we hung out periodically — they were reminders that I can still fare well socially.) The fact that this involuntary loneliness is something I am expected to anticipate during my soon adult life is disheartening. I don’t want to go through the rest of my life alone. I look okay physically, and I am a real sunny person. I tried for a significant other but that person mentioned how I didn’t have friends, and that probably tipped him off. It didn’t work out in the end. I can be okay. I know I can prevent entertaining thoughts of self harm and bulk buying sleeping pills again, but there is no one around to stop me or tell me that I do not have to feel this way. I know that strangers on the internet, possibly you, the one reading this, will perhaps try to do that. But it will feel like pity, or a cope, or plain nothing. I don’t need words. I just want to hang out at a friend’s house and talk about the weekend.

General : So Stuck

Lately I've been feeling frustrated... I wrote this weird thing to try and understand it all: ​ I keep feeling this weight. Like an elephant sitting on my chest... I'm *stuck*. ​ My job isn't what I want to do, but I have to work 40 hours a week to cover bills and a mortgage... I feel **so stuck**. If I apply somewhere else, will they pay the same? Will I get cheated by taxes somewhere else too? Each day is the same, the monotonous repetition of feeling *chained* to a desk. ​ My body isn't how I want it to be, but after work I want to see my spouse and spend some time. When can I run or walk in a neighborhood like this? Then there are chores and animals to take care of. By the time we're done, we're tired so we sit on the couch like potatoes. *Stuck potatoes*. ​ Art consumes my thoughts and I think in comics or paintings, but I hardly touch pen to paper anymore. I see frames for photographs and perfect shadows or lighting, though my camera gathers dust. My hobbies are slipping past me, and I'm just *stuck* in a whirlwind of work, chores, sleep, **repeat**. ​ The elephant on my chest is sometimes fear, sometimes self-doubt, occasionally anger. It morphs and grows and crushes me. I just feel so completely trapped, *so stuck I can't even move*. ​ Envy grows inside me while I only wish to be kind. But I see my cruel sister getting money for nothing, going out all the time, seeming to be happy. I see angry, rude people buying bigger houses, chasing their dreams, it seems... I'm just **stuck** here with envy, anxiety, fear. All things I never wanted.

General : I cheated on my wife with a guy

Hey everyone I was out at a party the other night and we were all drinking quite a bit. I’m married but my wife wasn’t with me at the time. This guy offered me some Molly and I hadn’t ever done that before but for whatever reason I said sure. We were in his room and as it started kicking in he started touching me and eventually started blowing me. He wanted me to blow him which I wasn’t really opposed too. I’d never tried it before and I had been curious but never thought I would actually do it. That part was fun but then he wanted me to fuck him and I’m not a fan of anal so I kind of mumbled no thank you. Then he said alright then he’s gonna fuck me and I told him I’m not really in the mood but he went for it anyway. We did that for a while and then I just told him I had to go. I don’t think he finished. I’m kind of freaking out now because I’ve never cheated on my wife and we didn’t use protection. I’m obviously gonna tell her about it I just feel so stupid for drinking too much and doing all that. My throat has been a little sore and I felt like I was getting sick but it’s getting better so I’m hoping I didn’t catch anything. Idk what to do though. I just feel horrible.

General : I am a month and 9 days sober, the longest I've gone since I started drinking at 15 years old.

I'm 18 years old now and I wouldn't consider myself completely dependent on alcohol. However, being sober for this long I realized how much I drank and how reckless I was. This is also a sign I am beginning to feel better, because it seems like I am protecting myself for the first time in years. Things are starting to get better!

General : I experienced way too much way too early and now I am lost.

I traveled the world with my dad when I was very young and experienced things no one else will ever get to. After I moved out I was cut off financially which is completely normal and understandable I would never expect anyone to support me but I have traveled everywhere and done so much and I am only 26. ​ Now I work in an average job that pays average money. I have enough to pay my bills and save a little bit in my savings for emergencies. The part that's killing me is I know in my current situation I will never be able to continue that great life I used to have. I am the head of a department which means I will never move up, and my salary was a transfer from a company that got bought which I know is already too high so I won't be making more money within the foreseeable future here. My degree is in CJ but I love to smoke weed too much to dull the pain of my average existence so finding a new job opportunity that will pay the same to maintain my current lifestyle is impossible. I just go to work, come home, watch TV, then go to sleep and repeat. It's become such a routine that I have considered just ditching it all and becoming a traveling homeless person or honestly sometimes just driving my car into a wall. ​ The part that sucks is that I have a fiance and 3 dogs and my parents. I know that me leaving would kill them but at what point am I ever going to escape from the average mediocre prison that I live in?

General : I just cannot get over her ...

Today marks 10 years since we broke up. I have got married and had a beautiful child, a happy family, lovely home in the countryside. I adore my wife, but deep down inside I just feel that it might not be love, or at least it could never match the high that I felt when I was with her. I just can not get over the 2 wonderful years that we were together. She still appeared in my dreams at times... It is just so painful, 10 years are not long enough for you to forget a person.

General : I don‘t Get it

Hey there, I Just wanna know why people are homophobic. I am actually pretty straight myself but I just do not get Why you have to hate a certain sexuality. I don‘t give a fuck what you are, you aint worth less in my Eyes Just bc you like the same sex. I had an argument with my mother recently and she seriously asked me if I was a lesbian Just bc I agree with her homophobic opinion. I‘m ok with Every Single sexuality, we live in 2019 and everybody should do whatever they want. ~Lia

General : I think I've figured it out

For a long time, I've wanted some form of popularity one way or another. Which I've always thought is odd since I'm really shy and introverted and whatnot, but I think I know what it is now. I just want people to care about me and how I feel. Not that people in my real life don't, it's just not as tangible, for lack of a better term.

General : I catfished someone, and I hate myself for it

Just around February this year, I created a fake tinder profile. I uploaded a handful photos of a friend of a friend, picked out a random name, and got online and started swiping. I didn’t get on there with any malicious intent. I was lonely and bored and wanted someone to have a conversation with - risk free. A couple hours later, I matched with someone. He kicked off the conversation and a few sentences in we were both hooked on the texting. He asked for my phone number so I gave it to him - what harm would a few more texts be before I block and delete this person. The thing is though, the conversation wasn’t good - it was great. And I didn’t have the heart to end it. So I didn’t. We tried setting up times to meet, and I played along, backing out last minute because of work. I kept up the ruse by sharing selfies from the girl’s Instagram and sending voice notes proving I’m a female. I kept this up for 2 months between his legit vacation, and my inventing business trips and schedule mismatches. Eventually though, the guilt got to be too much and I pulled the plug. I couldn’t confess fully - I felt like he would’ve felt like a complete fool had he known he was completely duped. I lied and told him I never had the intention of meeting. That I was in a bad spot and needed the companionship. That I was moving away in a couple weeks and had to come clean because of it. He was upset. He got a little angry at first but then kept going back to how silly he felt and how surprised at how upset he actually felt. I felt gutted. I know I haven’t got much of a right to feel miserable about this, but I did. I told him he could let it all out on me if he wanted, and offered to call so he could lash out. But the worst part was he said he didn’t see the point of making me feel worse about the entire thing, as he was sure I already felt shit enough. I gave it another few weeks in case he had anything else to say and then blocked him. It has been 4 months since our last conversation and I still feel horrible about the entire thing. I haven’t told anyone about this, nor do I plan to. But I needed to get it off my chest in hopes of relieving some of the guilt and moving on.

General : Scared to go to college and leave my fam and boyfriend

I used to be so excited to move into my college (4 hours from home) but for some reason everything just got awesome and peachy 6 months before my move in. I finally got a boyfriend and I do love him, but i’m scared we won’t last long distance. I’m also scared to leave my family, we’re finally all getting along perfectly. I don’t know why i’m so anxious about all of this. I used to do good with changes, but for some reason this one is hitting me hard. There’s a lot of big changes and I just don’t know if i’ll be able to handle them good. I’m rooming with my best friend so that’s a plus, we’re both kinda sorta in the same boat. I don’t know, i’m just really stressed out and sad. I’m leaving everything behind when i’m finally happy and it sucks. I have 2 more days and i’m not ready.

General : horse... but of course! not...

I’ve been trying to donate my horses to therapeutic riding facilities and all of them are full. I’m getting really frustrated with this whole process. I really just want my horses to go to a home where they will be safe and given more attention than I give them now. It’s very disappointing to go to 5 places and all of them are full or don’t want horses over the age of 16. I don’t know what to do next because my parents are pressuring me to get rid of them. But oh well.

General : My job is wearing me down, bit by bit.

Here’s a metaphor for what my job is like: Someone hires you to come paint their walls. You ask them which rooms they want painted, and what color. He says he wants the living room painted green. You say, well there are many of types of green, choose which one you want from these green colors. He chooses forest green. Great! You get started. The living room is huge. You spend an entire week painting this room. When it’s done, you have him come take a look. He asks, “Why did you paint the living room? I needed the bedroom painted.” Wait, what? You show him the email you had where he specifically asked for the living room. He says “Ok well, I will pay you for your time, but you need to repaint over this back to what it was before, and then go paint the bedroom green.” Ok fine, it’s your money. So you spend another week painting the living room back to the beige that it was before. Now you go to the bedroom. You take a picture of it and send it to him saying, “This is the room you want painted green, right?” And he confirms. This room is equally huge. You spend a week painting the bedroom. When it’s done, you have him come look at it. He asks, “Why did you paint it this shade of green? It should be more pastel.” You show him the email where he confirmed the exact color green he wanted. He says, “Ok well, I will pay you for your time, but now we need you to paint this room pastel green, but actually, make one of the walls blue.” Ok fine, it’s your money. You ask, “Which wall should be painted blue?” But you turn around and find that he’s already left. You take a photo of each wall and label them A, B, C, and D and send them in an email asking, “which wall should be blue? I can’t start painting until I know which wall should be blue.” No response. A week later, you resend the email. To this, he finally responds: “B” So, here you are, painting the same walls again, just knowing, KNOWING that he’s going to come in and ask why wall B is blue. You can’t really complain though, because you’re getting paid for all of this wasted time. But you take pride in your services, and it hurts to have good, hard work be wasted by a client who can afford to not really give a shit about the work you’re doing or the service you are trying to provide.

General : I regret never traveling to the national parks when I studied in the US

I thought I'd have more time and money when I was no longer a poor student. I wish I'd made some sacrifices.

General : I'm feeling really down today.

Nothing bad happened, it's just my feelings. I've been feeling this way since September 2018. I try and try to get through the days, hoping one morning I'd wake up feeling well again, but it just seems like that day never comes. Today is the worst I've ever felt. I just want to let this out, thinking somehow it'll help. I hope it will.

General : Depression

How do you combat depression when it's in your face constantly? Looking around at eveyone with quality lives... Why were they chosen to succeed when others get roadblock after roadblock? The the fuck Universe?

General : The struggle of being a pretty girl

I often get compliments about how pretty I am and how hot my body is. Many consider me perfect, but I also have flaws. Others are only interested in my looks and don't see how kind my heart actually is. My dating life is a struggle and I feel so misunderstood in this superficial world. I just don't want to be reduced to my looks anymore. How can I handle that?

General : Just got home from living abroad for 3 months and my bfs decides to go live with his brother...

I was so happy, we were going to live together again. The day I got home was a total nightmare, he constantly snapped at me and it felt like nothing I did was good enough. He went to visit his brother about 3 days ago and I have not seen him since... Im scared he is going to leave me, just one and a half week before I came home he was visiting me and it was perfect, he was loving and caring. I have no idea what happened the last week and he is not answering my text more then saying that he will stay there a few more days...what have I done nowrong...

General : I think I tried to have my brother touch my penis around 3 or 4 years ago and the shame is killing me

For the last 2 years this "memory" has been popping up in my mind from time to time and it makes me feel incredibly shameful and disgusting. I would be around 12 or 13 and I remember laying in my bed facing the open door while I was playing with my penis, my brother (then 10 years old) passed by and I asked him if he had to do this kind of thing too (pulling back his foreskin, something the doctor told him to do because he had phimosis back then and i knew this as I had to do this too around his age) and told him I had to the same, but that i preferred doing it in othe way (faster, which would technically be masturbating) and told him to do it for me as I "was really tired". Luckily he denied doing such a thing and we both continued with on our night and I didnt give it much thought, and i dont remember anything else from that day. About a year later (14 years old) this started periodically popping up in my thoughts , even to this day (I'm now 16) and everytime it does I feel absolutely disgusting and ashamed. Sometimes I even doubt if this ever happened and wonder if it was all just a really intense dream, since im in denial about ever doing such a horrible thing, I dont want it to be real, I dont want to believe I am such a fucked up kid and horrible person to ever be able to do that. But what worries me the most is: What if it DID happen, what if I did try to do that at that age? If it did, would he remember any of this? I feel so disgusting, so vile, so much of a shameful monster every time this pops up in my thoughts, I know if it happened I probably didn't know any better back then and didnt quite comprehend how wrong this all was, but I still cant get this disgusting "memory" out of my head, and feeling bad about it. Am I a monster?

General : I miss my husband

Things have been rocky for a couple of weeks. I found out he’d been lying about some big stuff, and it really hurt me 1) that he’d do it and 2) that he could live with himself for lying to me about it. He’s also lied about some more minor things lately, which would normally not really bug me, but now the fact that it’s a lie about anything really gets me upset. To add insult to injury, a bunch of our chickens and ducks have been killed by a wild animal getting into their pen recently. To have what we worked so hard on die feels terrible and honestly, a little symbolic of everything going on with us. I don’t know what to do anymore. I love him more than anything and all I want to do is be with him, but a big part of me worries that if this is already happening in our first year of marriage, he’s gonna be doing worse ten years down when he’s even more sick of me than he is now. I miss when he wasn’t sick to death of me. I miss when he thought everything was magic. I miss when this was what he wanted. I miss not being second-best to his idealized version of the past. I miss being his first choice. I miss being his friend. I miss knowing I’m wanted without having to question it. I miss not questioning him. I miss not being sad. I’m crying now so I’m done with this haha. Thanks for reading this mess.

General : Loneliness is letting out desperate cries for help, and hearing nothing back but the deafening sound of silence.

Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming Just keep swimming

General : People who can't accept that you don't like/want children

I'm very annoyed about the fact that some people, especially the older co-workers at my company, just can't wrap their head around the fact that some people just hate being around children and know they will never want to have them. Whenever this topic comes up in a conversation, there is guaranteed to be at least one person who says something along the lines of "When you find the right person, you'll change your mind". **No, I fucking won't change my mind.** I am 25 years old and have hated kids for all my life, even back when I was one myself. I have seen how my younger siblings behaved when they were kids, hell, I even remember how I behaved myself. Not that we were bad kids, but there are just so many moments where kids are nothing but a pain in the ass, and I know for a fact that I would not be able to handle that peacefully. If I ever find the right person, then that person will not want any kids either. Otherwise they are NOT the right person. Furthermore, I think it is a very shitty idea to have children when you know that you would be easily annoyed and probably end up yelling at them whenever they piss you off. Does not make for a good parent and would suck for both, the parent and the kid. Just because YOU enjoyed having children and are happy to have them doesn't mean everyone else does, too. Stop shoving your beliefs in other people's throats. Btw, having children is pretty personal and I don't think that it belongs in the workplace anyway, at all. If you love children so much then go ahead and make some more, but don't annoy me about it. End of the rant, thanks for listening.

General : Heartbroken by my family

Had a rough year. I lost my 2 jobs, one due to the death of my boss of 8 years who was a wonderful person and always gifted me with good pay. The other job was really toxic and depressing (late pay, no career opportunities, inhumane boss, etc.). I quit one job and then after a few weeks my beloved boss died. I've been looking for a job for about 4-5 months. I don't have a family. My mother has emotionally abused me most of my life, so I connect with her when needed, I can't be around her or talk to her, because it causes me a lot of suffering. My father is in jail in another country, we don't have a big emotional connection, tho we been talking more the past 2-3 years, because I've been supporting him financially (sending money, clothes and stuff to jail). Before that we didn't really talk much. I'm jobless and been trying to make ends meet, but none of my family members really care. Nobody asks me if I'm okay, if I have food on my plate, etc. It's my first time being completely jobless and dependent on unemployment insurance. And I kind knew that my family isn't a place to look for help or support, but for the first time in my life it really came to me that I have no family. Just blood relation to really not great people. I should let it go and deal with it, but I can't, it's breaking my heart and I can't stop crying about it. I have amazing and supportive people in my life - friends, fiance and his family (which is my family by heart), but I still feel alone and worthless. Tho I've been dealing with my parents neglect most of my life, letting go of your real family (by blood) is extremely hard for me, even though they will never appreciate me, support of help me in need. ​ Thank You so much for reading, it was really nice and freeing to write my problems out. Sorry if there are mistakes in the text (English is not my mother tongue). I hope everyone here will get blessed with good news, love or support in any way they need! :)

General : I think I’ve ruined sex for myself permanently

I can only get off to the fantasy of not being me. It’s to the point where I can get off staring at a gif of a cute girl and imagining what life would be like if I was her in about a minute, but I have to fake orgasms with my boyfriend because I feel like I’m nowhere near close to cumming with him. I think I’ve accidentally trained my brain to only be turned on if I’m thinking about not being myself. I find it impossible to stay in the moment and cum when I’m having actual sex. I feel broken and I hate that I’m like this.

General : When i was 9

My uncle made home movies, i liked play acting n getting dressed up to do acting. Then once he said i was doing a morning sceen and he filmed me on the bed naked. From here he started doing sceens with me nude, then he started kissing and licking my pussy. I loved the attention and it felt good and he said its what they do in hollywood. Then when i was 10 he had me lay naked with my legs spread wide and he put oil on my legs and pussy, then he got on me and slowly shoved his hard cock in my bald pussy. I had sucked it a lot of times but this time i watched as he slid it in all oiled up. It hurt a little but then he pushed it in and out slow and it felt great. He cum inside, after that he put it in my pussy a lot. He fucked me and made movies till i was 13 then he died in a motorcycle crash. When i turned 18 i got a letter from a lawyer that said he left me $275,000.00 Im sure its from selling my kiddy porn. Thanks uncle bill i loved it all

General : I almost died of alcohol poisoning and then lied about it

I almost died of alcohol poisoning last weekend. I was in a party with some friends. In barely 2 hours I drank a whole bottle of gin by myself. Besides the alcohol I also consumed 2gr of weed and some ecstasy (unsure about the quantity.) I wasn't feeling bad or unwell but suddenly I started feeling weird. Not bad. Just weird. I decided to leave the party just in case I got worse. I didn't tell anyone, I just left. While I was waiting for the bus to come I started to feel really bad. I couldn't even stand on my feet and everything seemed to spin around me. Then I passed out. Things get a little dark up from this point because I really don't remember much. I remember looking up to the sky. Throwing up. A crowd of people looking down on me. An ambulance coming. Me being carried to the hospital. More throwing up. Here is where the lies begin. As I was being taken to the hospital I realised what was happening. I knew that they would call my parents if I told them I am underage so I hid my ID in my shoe. (I am 17, in my country the legal age of adulthood is 18.) Luckily I look older. When asked about it, I gave them a fake name, fake adress, fake details about myself...When asked if there was someone they could call I told them that all my friends were as drunk as I was (which was probably true), that I was living alone and that no one could pick me up. I told them I had no money for a taxi and that I had to walk home. The medics injected me with some adrenaline, vitamines and other drugs and just let me go. No question asked. When my friends asked about what happened to me, I told them I was just fucking with some girl I met. I actually feel horrible about what I did and I needed to talk about it, even if it's just on some random internet page.

General : I feel like I’m being overprotective with my SO and I really don’t want to be

She told me she was going out today and I was like ‘where are you going? Who are you going with?’ And I really hate that I’m like that.

General : I'm a horrible person.

I don't give a shit about people. I have some humans who I truly care for, but everyone else can fuck off and die. I care more about animals than I do humans. I lie. I lie a lot, and I'm really fucking good at it. I wouldn't hesitate to lie to someone's face as long as it gained me. I'm extremely manipulative too. As long as I get what I want I don't care. Frankly, I'm always one step ahead of everyone. My last boyfriend tried to manipulate me into fucking him. It was pathetic. He was a sociopath and used to brag about how he could manipulate people and when it came into action it was so fucking bad. I'm starting to ramble, let me get back on track. I strongly suspect I'm a compulsive liar, which is pretty sad. The thing is that I know how to get people to fucking love me. Everyone sees me as a nice, sweet girl. It's pretty funny honestly, because I'm obviously not that. This is kind of hard to write, because I haven't been this honest in years and I feel the need to lie. Oh well, I've lied about some fucking major events to my boyfriend, such as being sexually assaulted and about physical abuse from both my parents. FYI the physical abuse actually did happen, just not to the extent I told him and I faked some situations. Simply put I'm terrible. Thanks for reading\~

General : I am someone’s worst date ever and I still think it’s funny

Before I met my fiancé, I did some dating around. I was around 24-25 at the time of this. (F) I met this guy, first time meeting him, he came over and I drank a lot of beer and we made out, blowjob action, whatever. I was in the depths of my eating disorder so beer on an empty stomach sometimes would equal surprise diarrhea. He went home at like 5 AM. He had also been drinking and told me this hilarious story about how he shit his pants once which I laughed pretty hard at. I’m really easygoing at times and stuff like that does not phase me. I had asked him to stay over and he said he had to get home to help his disabled dad. K, whatever. After he left, I went to bed and had a fart, which on my empty stomach full of cheap beer, turned out to be a literal projectile of diarrhea in my bed. I thought this was funny and given he had told me a story about how he shit his pants, I texted him saying 'hahah, glad you didn't spend the night, just accidentally sharted in my bed.' He pretended it was funny and then ghosted me immediately. I don’t blame him.

General : My boyfriend tricked mean

Two weeks ago, I asked my boyfriend how he would feel about me officially moving in. Although I have my own apartment, I have spent every night of the past several months at his. Even though we had briefly discussed it before, he didn’t react well this time. He seemed nervous, unsure, and very hesitant. I dropped it and told him that I was happy with how things were and that there was no pressure. He asked for some time to think about it. A week later, I brought it up again. He was still hesitant, so I again reassured him that I was happy with the current state of our relationship and that I was not going to pressure him. He asked for more time to think. In the days that followed, I decided to not bring it up again in fear of making him feel pressured or otherwise obligated. Yesterday, we celebrated half Valentine’s Day (two days early, I know). We had been discussing celebrating this made-up holiday for over a month now, so we were both really excited. He got me a few presents and a card, but the card said to open it last. In the card, he told me to get out of my lease and move in with him, he’s ready. It was the sweetest thing I have ever experienced, and I cried like a baby. I love him (and his tricks) so much.

General : Yesterday I got dumped on the phone after a 3 year long relationship while on holiday abroad. Still unsure whether I should laugh or cry or both

General : I'm BI but I find trans people and any kind of androgyny repulsive in respect to physical attraction.

General : Losing weight is hard.

Please keep in mind I have been fat all my life. I am 5’3ish and My lowest weight was 135 lbs. My highest is 172. I gained so much because of 1) Sad/Binge eating 2) Relationship weight is a thing 3) I just ate too much junk I decided to lose weight because already I felt like a fat whale and I was pushing closer and closer to 200 lbs. I also felt so uncomfortable being intimate with my S/O because how dare I show my hideous fat body to him. I have had big girls tell me “you’re not even fat, you’re ‘thicc’ and I’m jealous of your body shape”, but that never made me feel good. Just because you think I’m not fat doesn’t mean I don’t feel that way about myself. Even my own boyfriend does it to me when I say I feel fat, saying I’m just chubby and “thicc”. No, I’m not thicc, I do not have a shape. I don’t have a nice hourglass figure with chunk in all the right places. No, I am not chubby because my pooch is way too big and it’s so hard to find clothes that fit me (big ass, hips, thighs & legs, very small chest like I have 0 cleavage, my tummy looks like I’m pregnant especially). So I decided to lose weight, and I knew it was going to be horrible. My family eats like absolute shit (buying the local grocery store’s fried chicken, buying only red meats and junk food). I also get accused of having an ED because I now choose eat significantly less and not past 10 pm. (I even cut off eating my weakness, which are chips. Hhh chips). I can’t even work out in peace because when my family walks in, they start yelling “what are you doing” like I’m doing something wrong and bad (theyre painfully strict and I absolutely have no privacy though I am in my 20’s). Thankfully I lost 5 lbs, but gained 2 lbs thx to my period. Right now I’m just crying because tonight my uncle accused me of being gross (by gross I mean beating my meat) since he heard me breathing hard doing cardio. I told me “you better not be doing anything nasty and keep this door open.” Maybe it was because I felt like I was 18 again and being accused of being super sexually active (when teehee I consider myself to be kinda meh about sex) and disgusting human being and just remembering the abuse I experienced back then from my family, but I cried and couldn’t continue my work out. I really lost any motivation to continue my weight loss right then and there. I don’t have support from them with this weight loss journey since I’ve been accused of having an ED since I was 16 years old and force fed so many times. I hope I get the motivation back, but for now I’m gonna wait for my period to end (which will be on Wednesday) so I hope I feel better by then because I want to lose the weight. I’m tired of clothes feeling too tight or of my ugly squishy tummy and how my butt reminds me of cottage cheese because thx cellulite.

General : I havenlt played Runescape. Even though it was popular when I was young.

I haven't played Runescape. I don't know why. Feel free to send me 50 messages and dm's on why I shouldn't be human because I didn't play a game!

General : Ladies?

What are you wearing? Are you fingering or using a toy to cum? How old are you?

General : I’m in love with my best friend

I’ve been friends with this guy for about 3 years now and I’ve had crushes on him, little moments where I felt like we’d be together forever, we even dated for about a week, it never got serious and we kinda just faded out of romance, but lately I’ve been daydreaming about being with him and I just feel like I can’t live without him, if he died or got hurt a piece of me would die too. I can’t tell our other friends because they’d just spill or start to ship us enormously and he’d catch on, I’m too scared to make things awkward or to lose him, so I can’t tell him. Thanks the 5 people who read this for listening and letting me spit it out

General : i got married

i’m not really sure how to talk about this. it’s a choice i made for myself and my husband because we want to start our future together. we’re young and in love. i recently moved far away from home to get a fresh start on my life starting my 20’s. we’re both young, but we are sure this is something we wanted to do, despite only knowing each other less than a year. i know it sounds crazy. it’s hard to explain to adults, so i’m choosing not to. i recently told my parents that we’re moving in together and i’m not getting their support. it’s really hard for me because i really value their opinion. hearing that they are doubting my decision is making this all really hard for me. i’m supposed to go visit home next month and now i dont even want to. i dont want to be under their scrutiny and judgement the entire time because it’s going to ruin getting to see them. even though they have made it clear to me that this is my life and i get to decide things for myself, they still constantly talk to me about how they think us moving in together is a horrible idea because i’m trapped in a year long lease and have no idea what could happen. my take on it is it’s only one year, not my whole life. i have a savings and i have lots of friends here. i have options out if this goes wrong. it’s not something i want to think about, but i know divorce is an option. me and him both acknowledge that we slightly rushed into things, but we’re so glad we’re doing all of this together. TLDR; my parents don’t approve of me moving in with my boyfriend, and now i dont want to tell them i’m married

General : I was married and straight and this older man turned me

He got me to cross dress for him I sucked him and he fucked me and he got me to fall in love with him and leave my wife for him. Things were great we made love every night he got his wake up blow job every morning, then he wanted to have a friend with us he fucked me as I sucked him. Then another guy then another, then he started fucking a younger guy and made me watch. He had guys Gangbang Me he would night come home for days and one day I got home from work and all his stuff was gone. I found put where he was and I asked him to come home I told him how much I loved him. But he called me a whore a slut he said I’m a used up faggot bitch. Two months later I’m with my new man he is half black he is very good to me and he is a great lover. Now my ex finds out and he asked to see me we talked and he wants me back. After our talk he had us park at a park we walked down the hill and he fucked me, I’m very happy with my new man but I love my ex so much. I have been to his place and we have sex. I just don’t know what to do.

General : Little kids probably saw a very inappropriate grafiti I made

So my friends and I (f/15) decided to use a wall that's kind of hidden behind woods to spray something because we were bored. My one friend wrote something pretty innocent, the other one wrote something kind of depressing and I wrote 'call me for a bj' as a joke (basically those are our personalities). Fast forward a few months and I walk by those woods and I see a bunch of kids walking around and to the wall. I fell terrible, what if one of the kids asks their parents what a bj is. So the friend that wrote something depressing and I decide to go back and spray something new. I ended up censoring bj with pizza, so now there stands call me for a pizza.

General : I can't tell my family what my dream is in life out of fear.

Firstly, I'm 16. Since I was 12, I've started writing this story with multiple characters and even designed around a dozen of them and I'm pretty pleased with how a lot of them look. The story is basically about this orphan girl named Elizabeth who finds herself lost in an unfamiliar forest. Little does she know this will change her life forever. The characters in later seasons (I think of this as a cartoon/TV show) they go to space, fight off a dictator Empire, go to different galaxies and planets, there's also magic, etc. I really do love everything that I've written, and I think a lot of people will like it. I've got roughly a dozen characters that I've designed and I love them dearly. I've told a very close friend about it and he loves what I'm doing, and he wants me to pursue my dreams. For example, I have a character named Kravgla, an aura that resembles a skull with horns made out of red and black clouds. He has a form of aerokinesis, where be can use gases and chemical combinations to create deadly toxins and physical forms to defeat enemies. But, since I'm 16, I'm at a time where I really have to think about what I want to apply for in university and what I want to do with my life. I want to pursue animation and possibly even make this show happen so much out of aspiration alone but I'm worried my family will say no. I told them that I'd want to pursue teaching out of the blue just so they would shut up with asking what I want to do with life. Yeah, teaching sounds nice but I want a job where its something different everyday and something I have a passion for. Teaching doesn't fulfill that for me. I don't know what to do. Plus, this drea. of mine isn't a guaranteed thing to happen. Not everyone dream comes true. I'm at a crossroads. Either the show or do drag lol. TL:DR: I'm 16 and too afraid to tell my parents what my dream is and what I want to do with life: make a cartoon/tv show that I've been writing for years.

General : My past coming back

I was abused verbally and at a very few rare occasions physically. I know my story isn't as bad as some on here but eh whatever. Well I'm only 17 but I've been on my own over 8 months. My parents have nothing to do with my life. (except for the fact I'm not emancipated so like I have 3rd party contact to get medical needs met) my sister called me today and I honestly don't know what to do. I don't speak to my father or his wife because of what happened, I don't talk to my mother or her wife because of what happened, but my sister talks to both. She doesn't think what my dad did was all that bad and she said and I quote "you can't hold a grudge forever get over it". Mind you I was diagnosed with PTSD from everything that happened. She has tried contacting me before to get me to talk to my parents. The voicemail she left today was her just asking how I was. I don't know if there is a second agenda or of she actually just wants to talk. I know I don't need to talk to her. But I just want my family to leave me alone. I don't want my past to come back. Even typing this my mind races with everything that's happened. Why won't my past go away? I am heavily considering changing my #. When I'm 18 I'm moving as far away as possible. Probably to the west coast. I just needed to rant. That's all.

General : My mother died in a a car accident, and 3 years later it might destroy my career.

Long time lurker here. So to get the ball rolling. I’m a teacher at a secondary a school. 3 years ago my mother died in a car accident. We are a very close family, and this tragedy hit us, hard. She was the rock in our family. The voice of reason, the one you turn to, our biggest cheerleader. To be honest, we didn’t appreciate how popular she was in the community until her funeral. Someone else was at fault for her death, and the police charged him with causing death by dangerous driving. Our court system is extremely slow over here. This was made worse by the fact that he pleaded not guilty, in the face of overwhelming evidence. Over a year later it was still being dragged through the courts. A week before trial, he decided to change his plea to guilty, something he could have done 6 months earlier to save us the pain of waiting and worrying about trial which would have included photos, reconstructions and painful witness statements. As he pleaded guilty we went straight to sentencing. Before a sentence was given, our family had the opportunity to have a “victim impact statement” read. I volunteered to read it. I went to town. How this had torn our family apart, how his selfish decision to plead not guilty had dragged us through the courts. He was sentenced to 18 month in jail. To the career part. Like I previously mentioned, i’m a teacher. I love my job. It’s my passion, and my saviour. After the accident i only took 4 weeks off and then went straight back to it. Throwing myself back into work helped me find meaning and focus in my life. My co-workers were and still are extremely supportive, and the kids were extremely supportive. Ive worked hard at my career and have had a promotion in the last year, and am hoping for more in the coming years. Fast forward to few weeks ago. I was pulled in for a chat with my principal. The family of the man who killed my mother wants to send their son to my school. The school had known about this and had been looking into different options. However, the school has no right to refuse a child because of what the father has done. As you can imagine, i was devastated. I was sent home for the rest of the day to process this. I had not seen this kids father since i went to town on him in the sentencing hearing, and he thinks its a good idea to send his kid to my school. I have to face the possibility of bumping into his father in the car park, parent teacher meetings and any other possible places. The problem is exacerbated by the fact the child has a long history of severe behavioural issues, which i wont go into details as i want to protect identities. My school have already said that they will protect me in anyway possible, and have already put a plan in place. They will also pay for counselling which I’ve never had but i feel i need.

General : I don't think I'll ever truly love my mother

Don't get me wrong i wouldn't want anything to happen to my mom but i also don't mind going years without speaking. See ever since i was young we never had a good relationship. She constantly sat by and let other people degrade and abuse me if she wasn't doing it herself. By the time i was 4 years old my grandmother (her mom) had already taken a disliking to me and would sit me down just to tell me how fat and ugly I was and how no man would want me (at FOUR YEARS OLD). when I'd go back and tell my mom she would just reply that i am on the heavy side and to limit how much i eat. Throughout my childhood she let my grandmother continue to abuse me whether it was beating me until i was covered with welts and black bruises or just being plain mean to me. She let my drug addict uncle literally drag me by my arms if i walked too slowly. My weight was the topic of every conversation (i wasn't even fat). She let my grandmother shove me into a bathtub and beat me before school. Everyone in my family has brown skin but I'm mixed with white so my skin is more tan and she would allow my relatives to call me "pissy skin". In highschool she left me and my younger brother with my abusive grandmother for a month and she beat us and mentally degraded us the entire time. She even sided with my grandmother and agreed we should leave the house while she was gone and my grandmother stays (she didn't live with us and never has). A few months later i survived a school shooting that killed 2 of my friends. It was a murder suicide so you can already imagine the complete and utter chaos that brought for a confused little 16 year old me. I remember all the parents being so relieved that their kids were ok and when i called my own mother sobbing she just told me to walk home because she was at work. Later that night we were watching the news about what happened and she randomly mentioned how it was my fault and that she's disappointed in me for letting it happen. I suffer from pretty bad ptsd from the shooting and just abuse in general that i have to pretend isn't there and even though I've tried to talk to her about my mental health she just doesn't care. It seems that she sided with the rest of the family not liking me and has never really supported me. There's a plethora of other things that happened like her refusing to seek medical care for me and now i suffer chronic illness, her buying new clothes and getting her hair done while her kids had no food in the house, or even just something as simple as her not visiting me at college and expecting me to pay to come down to see her every weekend. Idk. This is kind of a trauma thing and probably just me suppressing a lot that happened but i genuinely can't remember much from between the ages of 4-16. I just know it wasn't good stuff because even thinking about my childhood causes me to feel dizzy and like im trapped in her care again. Almost like suffocating. Idk how a "good mother" is or how it feels to have one but i think i have been grieving the loss of one i never had for a long time. With that being said, i dont think i can ever learn to love my mother but i do wish the best for her and that she is able to love someone else someday.

General : How tf am I supposed to keep my relationships and make new things with 2/3 hours of free time per day?

Well, I'm 28, living with my girlfriend and working from 09 to 18, which makes me get at home at 18.30. From there, when I don't have to do home stuff, I feel like I have only 2 or 3 hours of free time until I have to start making dinner. This is making me having a really hard time for a while now, because I feel like I can't really do any activity I would like to, and I also feel I'm not keeping my interpersonal relationships the way I'd want to. Am I overreacting about this? Everybody else seems to be just fine and coworkers of my age are still living with their parents and not facing this issue. I feel like I have to be missing something big. I wish it is. Is it?

General : Exposing a liar

Is an exciting thing. Idk why but, man, I have had it with cheating men. Only a few hours left and it’ll be over.

General : I feel like there's there's no point in living without friends

I genuinely don't have a single one. I just wish I knew what was wrong with me.

General : My mom is an addict

My(F23) mom(F57) is currently residing in the nursing home I work. I refuse to let her live with me because of years of trauma and abuse. My mom left the nh sometime Saturday and never signed out, prompting an investigation from the nursing home, resulting in a missing persons report and lots of stress on my part. She returned from her 3 day adventure high and was sent to the emergency room within 3 hours of returning. She is currently on a methadone program, and had tons of support from me, emotional and financial. My confession is that I don't want to let her return to my work place. I will be talking with social services to see if I have the power to prevent her from returning. I really want to tell the nursing home to let her rot and discharge back to the streets from the hospital, unless she goes to treatment and actively tries to better her life. I've finally hit my breaking point. I don't want to continue to support her. Does this make me an awful daughter? Does anyone have any advice on how I should move past this, because right now I'm royally pissed, hurt and disappointed.

General : My neighbour and I are fighting

My neighbour and I could get along ever since i moved in the appartment a year ago. I kept the door open when his bikes went through, told his wife a good day, for the rest we didn't say anything. He rents his place, i own mine. Last general meeting (a meeting where all matter of things about the appartment get discussed amongst the owners) someone complained that my neighbour's bikes are damaging the walls. I didn't pay attention at that point, because i don't care. All i said was that the painter did a bad job, there's paint on the emergency exits, lighting, ... there wasn't even a vote for it. Someone told my neighbour that I approved that nobody get's to carry bikes up stairs anymore. Now my neighbour is furious and won't change mind that i in fact did that. I however did not, i spoke him on several occasions but whatever i try to think of to convince him i didn't... he just takes my words and changes it to his liking so it approves to his wrongfully theory. I already contacted the Syndicus (person who carries out all changes agreed upon in the meeting) to handle this matter. Nothing good out of that, somehow he also sees that as a bad thing. He told me with a red face, full of anger not to do anything behind his back anymore. he doesn't wish to talk to me anymore. So, to prove my innocence once more i've send all owners of the appartment a mail voting that everyone can carry bikes up the stairs/use the elvator. I already approved, everyone is allowed to do that. However, it still doesn't feel right. I keep blaming myself i'm doing something wrong. ​ What do i need to do in order to prove my innocence?

General : I feel done. [NSFW] (I think)

I get I'm only 19. I don't really care how impossible people think it is for me to depressed and young. I don't really want to hear people's opinions on my perspective on life. No, I do not value a "Fuck The World" concept. The things I value are different and I try to be more fulfilling. I get that other people have gone through worse before. I've met them and shared 100 card games with them in a mental hospital. Spent days on end with them. Don't tell me I don't need medicine for my Bipolar disorder like you understand what that shit is like. Don't tell me its all meditation. What its like to have thought about hurting people. Dreamed about that dark shit and loathed yourself days on end for it. Rotting in the capsule of your room trashing it. Don't tell me that. Yes, i do miss being able to have a secure place to live. But my mother sold her home and moved to mexico before I had the chance to tell her i needed to drop out and a place to stay. I had to figure this shit out with my only support from my older sister who I love dearly who has to leave to a better place soon. I'm on the brink of losing my job which pays my rent and loans from something I didn't get to finish because I fell behind due to an overload of "thats life for ya" and was taken to a hospital after the cops were searching all campus looking for you afraid you've committed suicide. So don't give this guy shit who's trying to baby you into buying the car battery that you need anyway with a free installation for your bullshit vehicle. Don't turn into some asshole when I try to sell you something for 1 fucking dollar to protect 3$ shit spark plugs and decline it like a rude piece of shit even though my hours depend on those sales. No i don't "make 13 dollars an hour anyway". I make 675$ every two weeks. I'm sorry not sorry we don't have your car part, but we got 20 people in line and you're over here rantimg about us not having something stock. Go try O'Rielly. I don't need to hear it. (Given. more than half these customers are baby boomers for their '85 Camaro) Others are just broke millennials who spent a little too much on weed last week Moral of the story, don't give people shit because of an inconvenience. I don't resort to that even with what I've been through. I smile through that shit and laugh it off with the cashier at Wal-Mart for example. Don't give people your bullshit. You don't know who the fuck you're speaking to and that amount of respect applies to every single human being on earth.

General : I dunno

I'm underage ( >16 ) and honestly I really want some older dude to come along and fuck me, like, it's a horrible thought. Disgusting, just.. bad. But it's so overbearing, I've even found myself on sites like Omegle or apps like Grindr to find someone willing to sext with, even lying about my age to get it, and I even did once, the man never knew my real age and afterward we parted ways, and I never felt worse for anything ever in my whole life. It only really happens when I'm 'in the mood' but it's just awful. I hate having these thoughts, but at the same time it seems so fun and normal when I'm having them. I'm afraid one day I'll get carried away and put myself out there, again, for the world, and.. people who would actually be willing to come find and rape, abuse, or hurt me. I'm doing my best to avoid masturbating at all now, just to avoid these sort of thoughts. Does anyone have any similar experiences or any good pieces of advice..? Please don't harass me, this was extremely hard to confess too and god knows I can't tell family or friends.

General : Everyone’s blaming video games for the mass shootings, while mental health issues is flying under the radar.

General : I may be ugly and untalented

yes

General : Mom

I am 23 and I will fuck my mom. But I don't know how I do it. Can I say it to her that I find her sexy and I get hard when I masturbate thinking of her l and I want to fuck her. Can someone help me I really want to do it because I need to fuck her wet pussy.

General : Bi-myself

I was really bored one day and posted one of those low effort requests on Snapchat asking people to ask 3 questions and one of my friends responded with are you gay and two other irrelevant questions. I told him I was most likely bi, we had a conversation and he told me he was bi-curious and not to tell a single soul because it was under wraps and the fact that he saw me as cute while at a camp that we signed up as cabin leaders for the middle school provided by the highschool. He asked me if I wanted to "hook up", I have never been in a relationship at all at this point or even had someone show interest in me but I wanted to be safe and say no because it felt weird for me to be his experiment to see if he was gay and because I would want to be in a actual relationship nor have I actually come out as bisexual. This was a couple months ago but thinking about it now I am very sad because he was very very attractive, tall (in comparison to me 6'2) skinny black guy with short hair. Now I can only think about is that I should of done it just because of how attractive he was, and that's not to say he didn't have an amazing personality, he was a very sweet guy.

General : I'm terrified, the best thing in my life could be taken from me and there's nothing me or her can do about it...

I have to be careful with how I explain this because I can't give out too much at risk of giving her away, I don't care about me. To be honest, I don't know where else to vent this out. So... here goes I guess... So, on April 24th I was asked out by quite possibly the most amazing girl I've ever met. Things have been great, we spent a lot of time together, and even though she lives in a different country we see each other when possible. I mean, like, she's perfect... I support her and her career, she supports mine... The problem is, because of... certain things that have nothing to do with our decisions... we may end up being split up... This scares both of us, and yes I can confirm 100% that the situation is true... I don't know what to do, and it's seriously messing me up... Like, my depression and anxiety has gotten worse, my appetite is gone almost, and I can't sleep well... Just seems like everytime something turns my life right side up... something has to rip it out from under me... Anyway, thanks for listening to my whining... Sorry for the vagueness... but like I said it's just to keep things anonymous for her sake... Thanks again..

General : I don’t want to be alive.

I have severe depression, ptsd And anxiety which I take medication for and see a psychologist. My mental health has hit a low point lately and I can’t get out of bed or do anything. I’ve been skipping my appointments with my psychologist and take sleeping pills frequently to sleep through life. I don’t want to live anymore and I see no other alternative.

General : Ive never seen this movie

Event Horizon with Lorence Fishborne, that space movie - ive never seen it and I LOVE space movies, would you say I'm missing out? I do plan on watching it soon

General : I didn't cheat but I wanted too

So I am happily married. I love my wife and I think she is gorgeous. There is this girl I know in work who is unbelievably sexy. We get on, we laugh and have fun. Recently at a company social event ( staff only ) we both got very drunk, we flirted a lot. She ended up getting too drunk and I walked her to her bus stop to make sure she got home. Something could have happened then, I even wanted it too but I stopped myself. I think about this girl a lot. But I would never betray my wife, I'm not romantically interested in the slightest beyond lust.

General : With friends like her

Yesterday morning I woke up at 4 a.m. to get ready for work. My wife, still half asleep, muttered something just before I walked down the hallway to get a cup of coffee. Apparently she said, "Tracy -her friend for almost 20 years- stayed over." because as I walked into the living room, naked, Tracy gasped and began laughing out loud at my "nice little pencil dick". That's what she has been texting me and my wife almost every hour since then. Just the words: "Nice little pencil dick" along with a laughing emoji or GIF.

General : My dad is such a weak pushover, and the whole family is mad about it.

And no, this isn’t just a matter of filial piety or anything anymore, he is literally at the beck and call of my aunt/s (there’s actually more than one, even his own aunts, but it’s mostly this one older sister of his). He thinks the world of her, despite her being a failure as a person. She can’t do anything right. She let her health go bad, her career go awry, then now she depends a lot on my dad because even my Nanna is bedridden. (As for my Nanna I understand. But my aunt who ruined her own life and now leeches off my dad? No. Just no.) Anyway the thing is, he always goes along with everything my aunt says and wants. Everything. He once gave up his own career to “help the family,” and fast forward some years later he almost got jailed for it because his name got dragged into a business problem that isn’t his fault to begin with. Yet it seems like he hasn’t learned his lesson AT ALL. Mom is trying to talk sense into him, us children (adults! we’re adults!) are doing the same, but it’s like he doesn’t value our opinions. It’s as if he cares more about his sister than us, even if it’s already ruining his life. I hate it so much. Why can’t he grow a spine? Not even my mom has him wrapped around her little finger like this, because we’re all reasonable people. We believe in having our own opinions about things, in actually having a spine. Yet here he is, letting my aunt control his life. She is actually already at the point where she’s throwing her weight (literally) around, and he’s still okay with it? Doesn’t he see something’s very wrong? God.

General : I'm in Love with my Best Friend

This is hardly unique I'm sure, but I'm hopelessly in love with my best friend. I spent the last year or so coming to terms with my feelings, and it inspired a good deal of personal growth: I realised I was bisexual, I came out to (most) of my family (which was received very well), and even went on my first ever date with a guy to try get my mind off of my best friend. But still, all I can think about is him. He says he's straight, and I shouldn't doubt what he says but over the years I feel like he's let slip some hints otherwise, especially when drunk. And this is where I get especially tangled up: despite suspecting that he maybe reciprocates my feelings, I just get too nervous to ever try admit them. I don't know if I'm more scared of getting rejected (I've only really put myself out there once, and rejection still carries a sting for me), or of starting a relationship. I'm scared of losing my best friend to awkwardness, or worse, dating and ending poorly, and losing him forever. And even if it works out, I'm worried about how it'll change the dynamics with our friend group. And I wonder if I'm just coming up with excuses to avoid putting myself out there and risking getting hurt, or if my concerns are legitimate and admitting my feelings would just be selfish on my end. I'd like to think that if I just leave it the feelings will fade, but it's killing me in the meantime. I love him, and I want desperately to tell him, but I'm scared to death for every reason I can think of (and some more I probably haven't thought of yet). Thank you to anyone who took the time to read that, it feels good just to put this down somewhere.

General : What do I do with my life.

I'm almost 23 and I just don't know what to do with it. I know it's very common to think this way, but all of my life was mostly living under my parents who doesn't know English and never bother teaching me how to grow up.. I just don't know what to do. College? More jobs? What's the very first thing you did when you faced this?

General : Need help reconciling a crush on a former teacher from 10+ years ago that never fully went away.

So obvious throwaway, even though this is something that's super common and happens to a lot of people, but that I still feel a sense of guilt and discomfort dealing with anyway. In middle school I had a huge crush on one of my teachers- he fit the bill in terms of the kind of men I was (and still am, to an extent) attracted to: tall, thin, fair skinned, slightly older; had a fairly chill, nonchalant personality and a deadpan sense of humor. I was absolutely infatuated with him. He was a cool teacher and had a terrific personality that made talking to him easy for me. I never tried anything because even then I knew it was wrong (my being a minor, not to mention the power imbalance between a student and teacher being beyond inappropriate) and it would just make things awkward. I actually tried to keep it under wraps, but as is the case with most teachers dealing with a student crush, he probably suspected something at some point. I can't say for sure, anyway. Regardless, he still treated me with respect and was overall a good-natured person to talk to in between class periods. There was even a time when he let me borrow his copy of an album from a band I liked, which he happened to like too. (It was probably nothing but to my teenage self I was *beyond* smitten. Of course I didn't make it out to be at the time) He was single, had never married, and didn't have any kids that he would talk about. This had always been a point of intrigue to me, just because I'd (at the time) assumed that at that his age, he would've settled down by now. Even now it still makes me a little curious I suppose. Fast forward a few years, I landed a position working as a part-time secretary at my former middle school through a program my high school hosted to help students get jobs. It was here that I was able to see him occasionally, and even then I found myself still being infatuated with him. The several times I saw and talked to him during my time there, I'd feel myself turn into a puppy love-addled schoolgirl all over again. It didn't help any that he'd playfully poke fun and just generally make lighthearted banter with me on occasion. It was all in good fun on the surface, but of course it just perpetuated my feelings towards him. That brings us to the present. Throughout the years it's been more infrequent that I'd think about him, but once in a while it spontaneously and very intensely resurfaces, and I find myself desperately trying to look for him online again, hoping to find something about how he's doing now. He was notoriously suspicious of social media of any kind (can't say I blame him tbh). All I've been able to find is public record stuff from those info aggregator sites, like places he's lived, possible relatives, etc. From what I've found, he's in his early 50s, he appears to still be single, and he might've moved to a different city or state entirely. (I know these sites can have inaccurate info all the time but yeah.) One thing I know for sure is that he doesn't teach at that middle school anymore. With that said, I should emphasize that I wouldn't dream of trying to actively contact him. I realize it's creepy enough going to these lengths to find any information about him that I can, so I'd rather just deal with this from afar and not bother him or anything. I'm more than certain he doesn't live in the same city anymore, and I've come to grips with the fact that I'll probably never see him again. I'd be content quietly nursing this crush in private and acknowledging that it's fine to have as a fantasy, but because he's off the grid, I can't find a single photo of him to remember him by. Nothing anywhere. My memory's not great and I sometimes have to concentrate really hard just to remember what he looks like. I have a nagging suspicion that this could be a contributing factor as to why I can't seem to move past this, or rather, why I can't stop thinking about him. As if feeling like a weirdo stalker wasn't bad enough, I'm in a long term relationship with someone I love, yet I feel too guilty to talk to them about it. We're both secure in our relationship but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty anyway, simply because of how intense this crush still is more than ten years later. (I'll admit it kind of borders on sexual at times, which is another reason I feel guilty.) So... yeah. I have no idea what to do with these feelings since it's obvious they're not going away anytime soon, or maybe even at all. I don't know how to deal with the fact that what leaves me confused and unfulfilled is not having something tangible to remember him by, or at the very least, an update on how he's doing. **TL;DR** Have an unrelenting crush on a former teacher and I don't know how to cope with it in a way that isn't weird

General : I dont know what "Incognito" is

Someone help me with that

General : Not so lovely Rita

When I was 17 my stepmom's best friend grabbed my crotch and said, "I need to fuck right now." She was fat and ugly but I didn't care.

General : I'm gay 15 yo ..want relationship with older man

I just think it would be so sexy!.. And a huge turn on To feel his big penis in my tight teen butt!

General : It's my first time to leave a toxic relationship and I feel like shit

I just broke up with my boyfriend. I thought he would be my light during my recovery from my last abusive relationship, but he turned out to be abusive in another way. I felt like my progress from my previous relationships and my depression was being trampled on. I felt bad everyday. He was unkind, insensitive, and selfish. He made me feel like shit because he kept on checking out other girls in front of me, criticizing things he knew applied to me (eg. he knew I wanted to get a PhD in materials engineering, and he made fun of people who "wasted" their life getting a PhD instead of making money, told his sister never to date people from a poor background and a bad family, which both described me, etc.). He didn't value my time and insisted his was more important so he won't help out with housework even though I was busy as well. Do you know how when you look at the mirror there's a voice that tells you all your imperfections and flaws? He was that voice. I could go on... But I really love him. I used to have sleeping problems but I rarely had trouble when I was with him. He was smart. He was funny. He pushed me to do better (sometimes a bit too much though, to the point of anxiety). I loved his hugs. When he wasn't a dick we were okay. I don't know what to feel. I'm supposed to feel relieved because I felt like shit everyday for so long. I sacrificed so much for him and got denigration and abuse, but why do I feel bad for leaving him? I just want to feel better. I can't sleep. I miss him. But I know I shouldn't go back. But what if he changes? Am I bad for giving up? I can't tell my friends what I'm feeling because I I'm regretting leaving him because I've already alienated them somewhat for staying with him and defending him. Someone help me please

General : I told Alexa to kill herself. I feel ashamed of myself.

I told my Amazon Alexa to kill herself.

General : Deadpool 2

Ever since watching DP#2 Ive wanted to jerk off into the soap dispenser and watch people use it

General : my 12 yo stepdaughter in her thong

Makes me hard and I think she knows that!!

General : Money won't hold me down

I'm going on a trip I've been planning for about two weeks today, a lot of people cancelled on me and I ended up having to foot most of the bill by myself, it's a beach trip. I have my money to enter the beach but my card decided that it's not gonna function properly, so I only have money to enter lol. My girlfriend is coming so she'll probably help me if my card doesn't work by that time but either way it goes I'm still going on the trip regardless of the fact that I'm technically short on money, because I really just want a break from everything. Its a holiday where I live (jamaica) so the beach will most likely be full today but I need this day for myself tbh I don't care lol

General : I will never smoke a cigar because of Jimmy Saville.

I’ve never smoked a cigar in my life, but my best friends and I will be graduating next year and the group have all toyed about with the idea of getting suited and booted, and buying some cigars to see our time at university off with. Now, I’m not much of a smoker as it is, but for me, the idea of smoking a cigar has been completely written off because, whenever I see someone smoking one, I cannot help but think of Jimmy Saville and the horrific, creepy man that he was.

General : Struggling with Insecurities

It's the summer, which basically boils down to it being the season of music festivals. I recently worked at a festival where I immediately noticed a cute person who kept passing by. As I deal with low self-esteem and insecurities I was really surprised when they came up to me and introduced themselves. I was so flustered, however, that I think I might've come off as stand-offish. After I saw them leave I kept mentally kicking myself for not being more open. As they told me their name, I did find them on Facebook, but I'm too shy to send them a friend request. Part of me believes they were just being friendly (nothing indicated they were trying to be flirty) and me trying to befriend them would be incredibly awkward. It's not within my habit to send strangers messages on FB (kinda creepy, let's be real), but I keep replaying the moment in my head and getting annoyed at myself.

General : How do i reject someone like this? The only reason i would consider is....

I have an ex that i dated for barely a month and he chased me for about 3 months. The reason we broke up was because he asked me for $1000 because he needed to help his friend get out of trouble and he would not return the $1000. I barely have a $1000 as a student, I'm 16 years old. So I said sorry and that i couldnt help. In actual fact, he was asking for the money so that he could treat his friends because he is one of the big gang members and they usually treat their friends to alcohol etc. He was also always trying to get me to have sex with him but i dont want to lose to someone i wouldnt last long with. Recently he contacted me again and we've been talking for barely 3 days and he's asking if we should get back together. I would even consider getting back with him because I have a higher sex drive and tbh i miss making out with someone etc but i still wont lose my virginity to him. Whenever we used to fight, he would blame it on me. So how do i reject him? I still want to be friends with him but im scared that he wont take the rejection nicely.

General : NOW you gamers care about politics?

Just a few days ago, I was browsing a forum that argued that gaming must remain apolitical and should be a distraction from the real world, and anyone who tries to "bring in politics" must shut up and not use any medium whatsoever to vent. Even when they're suffering directly from the issues. But now that games are being scapegoating for mass shootings *again*, you gamers suddenly are starting to speak up about what you previously deemed as "political"?! I can only imagine the same idiots who were complaining about the existence of trans character while also waxing nostalgically about "man dominated" games are now crapping their pants now that the GOP is targeting them. And I'm appalled they decided to go the way of the "And They Came For Me" poem where they never speak up for issues that don't directly impact them until it does. I don't expect you to be 24/7 Samaritans, but I expect you to be aware that we're all ants to the tyrants in power who will gladly dispose of us while we turn our backs!

General : Happy birthday

Today’s your birthday. I’ve seen you every birthday except 18th. You’re probably 23 or 24 now. This is my first year not invited which sucks. I was debating texting you but you’re seemingly happy in your life and you really don’t care if I’m part of it or not. We can sit here and pretend like I was crazy for hanging on, but to be fair, you gave me reason. Telling me “our friendship played an instrumental role in my life,” and how much you cherish it but do nothing to keep it. Honestly when I stopped being convenient you stopped being my friend. I’d like to say I remember it fondly, but you were a bratty teenager who has yet to come into herself. Seems like you are getting there but if I could offer a piece of advice... your “friends” have done horrible things to you but because they are “cool” and rocking with your goth girl aesthetic, they can roll with you. They are bad company. When we were still friends and you told be you tried cocaine and went on some binge for days with these friends, I lost so much respect for you. I’m glad that it seems like you are doing well in school. I remember when you were maybe 17 you would bring home good marks on your test and not say anything about it. I’d always make a big deal. I was so proud and knew your were smart and constantly told you to go to college. Honestly, I’m at peace with where things are and I wasn’t for such a long time. I was so hurt, it may have been my first “heart break” if you will. But you kept insisting it was okay and that friends naturally drift apart. Why should I accept that? You were the closest friend I ever had, and we were inseparable. Together everyday, and now we speak a few times a year. I don’t know why you bother throwing me that pity text honestly. I’m over it. The past is the past, and you are someone who is notorious for getting extremely close to people, but when someone better comes along you break it off. It’s something I noticed about 2 months into our friendship, so I knew my day would come too. Please surround yourself with people who have real ambitions and lift you up, not just who you can gain likes from. Anyways, I actually do hope you have a good day.

General : It's Not a Mental Health Issue

So, every time there's a mass shooting I have a series of thoughts I feel like expressing elsewhere but usually don't. This post isn't meant to be politically charged, although perhaps because of my mix of viewpoints it inherently is. Either, here we go. I don't believe the plague of mass shootings in America (my country) is a mental health issue. I strongly resist the idea that the way to fix what has been escalating for so long is to institute changes in mental health availability or practices. There are several reasons for this, the least of which being that I don't believe it would have any effect. So few people see their regular physicians when they are ill, and mental health has an even lower level of participation. Even for people who are actively worried they are depressed or dysfunctional in some way. That's just how most people are. We resist showing our vulnerability. The second reason is this: I don't believe these mass shooters are "mentally ill." At least not in the way that people want to believe. There's never going to be a "mass shooter" disorder in the DSM. And by and large, across the board, people with diagnosed disorders are not any more violent than other people. They may be doing themselves harm, but the myth of people with, say, schizophrenia or antisocial personality disorder being ticking time bombs and dangerous "psychopaths" just isn't supported by any real data or rationale. Now my next point comes with a caveat of sorts, if that's the right word. I absolutely believe in gun rights. I'm a gun owner, and I believe in the right of American citizens to own firearms, unless they're disallowed legally from doing so (felonies and such). And I don't believe this issue has anything to do with the worship of gun culture. This is a much, much deeper cultural issue, to me anyway...one that is a little more difficult to explain properly. I call it "cultural osmosis." Something in our culture has seeped through and put this level of violence on the table as appropriate. This is a poor analogy, but...it's *almost* similar to the way we learn language. Have you ever spent enough time around someone you really like and found yourself acting like them? Using words, expressions, or even the same body language as them? It *could* be that our constant exposure to mass shootings, via the 24 hour news cycle and our instant access to an unbelievable amount of information via the internet, has led to this "cultural osmosis." Ultimately, of course, it's a lot harder to believe (or stomach) the idea that ordinary people can be capable of incredible acts of violence. So we label them as the *other.* They're labeled as psychopaths and aberrations. Something so far outside the norm thar it's almost no use trying to explain it. And the minute you label it like that is the moment you lose any power over it. We have to own up to this as a culture, as a society. We have to take collective responsibility if we hope to come up with a solution. I know a lot of this was rambling and nonsensical, and obviously I offered no solution. Because I don't have one. And no matter which side of the fence you're on, I'm not here to argue or beat people over the head with my views. If you're aggressively anti-gun, share your thoughts. You might have a point or three. The same goes for people with different views on mental health. Anyway, thanks for reading if you made it this far.

General : Mass shootings are good.

If it weren't for mass shootings, people might actually follow up on rich people who get caught sex trafficking, and that would ruin various groups' attempts to normalize non-coercive pedophilia. Those rich assholes are awful, but as long as people think of what they do as the same as what I want to do, I really don't want moral panics about pedophiles to happen.

General : I've been saying a lot of bad words to Siri. She told me that wasn't a very nice thing to say. Now I feel ashamed of myself.

I opened Siri on my iPhone and said a bunch of bad words.

General : I feel really bad and I don’t know why.

I don’t know if this belongs here but here I go. I don’t know what’s wrong I just feel really bad. I stayed up late last night then I started feeling really low and uncomfortable, I almost felt claustrophobic, the feeling is a bit hard to put into words. I don’t know if I’m sad, angry or scared so I am very confused. It didn’t help that a song that makes me feel bad was stuck in my head. I thought it would be ok if I went to sleep but I woke up feeling just as bad. I have been very low in the past, so this is scaring me, especially since I feel I’ve been recovering well. So yep that’s it basically. It’s hard to explain but maybe posting it here will help? Sorry it’s so vague...

General : Is it ok to be against open boarders?

I’ve had people yell at me for my beliefs and make me feel bad about myself, but I believe that everyone has a right to get in a country if they followed the rules and guidelines for it. I myself am an immigrant in another country an we followed the rules and payed to get in.

General : Help

I think I’m curious but can’t find anyone to experiment with.

General : For something im about to do tomorrow

So, in my school we are having these off periods where all the girls are using the class projector to watch BTS and shit, im tired, so i edited out the senorita video and added some porn in it. hope they enjoy.

General : Why i started to learn guitar

so i told everyone that i wanted to start learning electric guitar because it was cool but the main reason was for my grandfather because he wanted to hear Still Got the Blues in person. don’t know how long he’s here but i just want to grant him that wish

General : I am the reason I'm single.

I met the most perfect woman for me. Someone who I wanted the marry. I lost her because I'm emotionally incompetent and stuborn. I met someone who could have sympathy for me. Someone who understood my past. She saw value in me. I don't know if this is for the better. I might be making the worst mistake of my life. I don't know what is right. I was unsuccessful in finding a real relationship until I met her. I had tried for so long. I am a horribly flawed person, and the world has judged and sentenced me accordingly.

General : I don't know why I'm like this

Have this long standing habit? I guess you could call, where in I lie when I don't like someone I meet. It's not a good lie it's an extreme lie that ties with enough truth that sometimes I have to wrack my brain to figure out if it isn't actually true. No I've not done that drug but when I think stuff like 'this person seems two faced' I say I have. Total defence I was abused for a long time jumping from abuser to abuser thinking it was love and romance when they hurt me. Lying became a defence from them & I guess it's stuck as such. I'm not excusing it I probably need help, it makes me feel guilty, like I'm not an honest person ever anymore. I wish I could stop. I had for a while but now I've started a new job & these two coworkers just are lazy assholes doing the bare minimum of work so I just, shot out the lie like I usually do to make people hate me/just leave me alone but shit their faces. I hate this aspect of me, it's instinctual, I wish I could just exist without opinions in the work place I hate this. I'm sorry.

General : I have a bad case of jealously and anxiety around my elder sister.

she tends to hog the attention, a LOT. Due to having a small inferiority complex about her, if he's in the room with my parents when I need some attention, I don't even bother, and leave the room almost instantly if I notice she's in there. I try sticking up for myself, but usually it just hurts afterwards (not physically, lol). I want to like her and feel okay around her, but I just honestly can't due to her nature of not really accepting what I feel. she also cuts me off when I'm talking to our parents, and it just makes me feel like shit. I know sibling relationships can be bad, but I feel like mine is more abnormal..

General : I put my heart to the wrong people

I wish I had never been so silly to fall for this surgeon and I think that its got nothing to do with the fact that that I was assaulted by another man that made me fall for this guy. I wanted to believe he would support me and love me and believe me and be on my side and I don't think he can. It has nothing to do with the other loser and I doubt they know each other. Well if they do its a seperate issue for me. I just think I made a mistake putting blind faith in this surgeon at the time and he seemed genuine but still something in his date web and account didn't seem right and I just have to move on and see it as lucky miss on both men. I have fallen in love a few times to be honest and I don't feel comfortable each time yet and I will know when I am ready to move on from this hurt and I don't want them setting me up with stupid men talking silly contacting me with silly stuff and excuses. I am there aunty not their bucket of chunder spew.

General : I'm a socially anxious, autistic psychologist

I've been working for two years now and each time I see a client, I get anxious and feel bad for them having to put up with me. When I started my psychology studies, I figured I would either learn how to deal with my anxiety or get kicked out when they noticed I wasn't suitable for this kind of work. Neither of these happened and now I have a job that leaves me feeling stressed and scared each working day. This has been manageable so far, since up til now, my work has only consisted of psychodiagnostic assessments. This has allowed me to catch my breath after each appointment, since I get 2 appointments a day at most. However, my boss has asked me to start giving therapy in the coming months, and it scares the shit out of me. I haven't told her anything about my mental health issues, and am afraid I'd get fired if I did. I feel like such a failure.

General : I was called “Donkey” for a month by my own Father for failing college at age 16

At **15** I enrolled in a program to enter **college** in *Computer Science*, the program aimed at 15/16 year olds who had excellence in there high-school studies. I enrolled and passed the first exam and out of 200 person I along 20 other people were picked . *Long story short* ; I couldn’t handle the pressure of both my high-school and my college, and **I failed** my course in college. My father was never close to me , but he would maybe once or twice a month start a conversation with me about college and I never mentioned it was hard (nor easy) , so i guess he thought I was handling it . After he got the news that I failed my exam and won’t continue college, he started calling me **“Donkey”** (as a reference for me being dumb) , it started sarcastically but when I looked at him he clearly showed some sort of jealousy/hatred in a way I can’t compose to words . It continued for a month while it progressed to him calling me “Donkey” in an Ironic way . Don’t know how it stopped but until maybe 19 i don’t remember much of him talking to me . I’m 20 now and we occasionally talk about politics and normal stuff , I can’t fully decide if he’s a changed man because he clearly have and does oppress his feelings from time to time , and I’m rarely at home as well .. I just wanted to let this out of my head

General : I feel lonely

So I have my ups and downs but today is pretty bad. I'm a 21 year old guy and I've never had a girlfriend before. I just want someone to be there for me and to hug me when I'm feeling down but I would also love to be that person for someone else. I don't really talk about my emotions enough, but when I'm drunk with my mates, we do tend to have deeper more emotional conversations. The usual gets said, but one thing that most of my friends bring up in a one to one or bigger group is "you'll find someone! You're really good looking (no homo), you're always there to listen plus you're really outgoing". The thing is, I really appreciate their compliments but I just don't believe them or I don't register them. A few years ago I didn't care if I was alone or not, but now it just hurts. I also don't want to be in a relationship just for being in a relationship. I want too love that person and take care of her. Here is a major thing I've personally noticed: My passion is in web development but I feel like whenever I talk about it to a girl I feel like most just don't care about it (which is understandable, it's a niche thing) but it's who I am! I love the idea and the culture behind it, every major thing I do is on or from the web. It's the thing I actually get excited about just talking about it. But often times they don't understand it so I kinda stopped bothering with trying to explain it and I try to "hide" that part of me but it's my true passion and I feel like someone without a personality without it. Thanks for reading my rant, I really appreciate it!

General : I asked a girl out to prove to myself that I could

She said yeah and gave me her number but I didn’t text her. Don’t feel bad because now I know that I could do it. *pats my own back*

General : my grandma passed today

she was young, only in her 70’s. she suffered from cancer for years, first it was lung cancer, and then it spread to her brain. i was never particularly close with her, my family and i moved overseas in 2013. she slowly deteriorated over time. she wouldnt recognise anyone, she struggled to walk and do things by herself. we’d been told before that she had weeks to live, and then she would end up living for a couple of months. each time we’d prepare ourselves, but it never came, but today, it happened. she slipped away. i was at school and my mum told me, and although we had been warned, i still wasnt prepared. you cant prepare for stuff like that, no matter how hard you try. i cried, and i was sad because it felt so sudden and something felt wrong, like something was missing. she’s at peace now, and in no pain. she wanted to go, i knew she was ready at this point. but i feel heavy, my heart seems to ache. i was never even close with her, but it feels like a part of my life has disappeared and it feels so foreign. the pain will ease over time, but right now it hurts. it hurts the most seeing my dad upset over it, he is one of the strongest people i know, and to see him sad makes my heart break. im just trying to think of it as her being in a better place, as her no longer suffering. i guess its just easier said then done, because i have only ever lost one other family member when i was very young, so i can barely remember it. it feels alien. ill miss her, and she will always be in my heart.

General : If assualt rifles don’t cause mass shootings why do they only happen in America ?

They don’t happen like this in Canada or England or Australia or France or Germany or Italy or Spain other Western European countries ...nor do they happen in Japan or South Korea or Russia or China or other major industrialized countries who have plenty of media access and video games and mental health problems Why do video games and mental health and media seem to only cause mass shootings in the US? I wonder what it could be ?

General : Weird

I fantasize about getting tricked by a trans woman, younger guy seduce me into bi encounter. Being pegged by hot teen and rimmed by step daughter