My mother died in a a car accident, and 3 years later it might destroy my career.
2 months ago
Long time lurker here. So to get the ball rolling. I’m a teacher at a secondary a school. 3 years ago my mother died in a car accident. We are a very close family, and this tragedy hit us, hard. She was the rock in our family. The voice of reason, the one you turn to, our biggest cheerleader. To be honest, we didn’t appreciate how popular she was in the community until her funeral. Someone else was at fault for her death, and the police charged him with causing death by dangerous driving. Our court system is extremely slow over here. This was made worse by the fact that he pleaded not guilty, in the face of overwhelming evidence. Over a year later it was still being dragged through the courts. A week before trial, he decided to change his plea to guilty, something he could have done 6 months earlier to save us the pain of waiting and worrying about trial which would have included photos, reconstructions and painful witness statements. As he pleaded guilty we went straight to sentencing. Before a sentence was given, our family had the opportunity to have a “victim impact statement” read. I volunteered to read it. I went to town. How this had torn our family apart, how his selfish decision to plead not guilty had dragged us through the courts. He was sentenced to 18 month in jail. To the career part. Like I previously mentioned, i’m a teacher. I love my job. It’s my passion, and my saviour. After the accident i only took 4 weeks off and then went straight back to it. Throwing myself back into work helped me find meaning and focus in my life. My co-workers were and still are extremely supportive, and the kids were extremely supportive. Ive worked hard at my career and have had a promotion in the last year, and am hoping for more in the coming years. Fast forward to few weeks ago. I was pulled in for a chat with my principal. The family of the man who killed my mother wants to send their son to my school. The school had known about this and had been looking into different options. However, the school has no right to refuse a child because of what the father has done. As you can imagine, i was devastated. I was sent home for the rest of the day to process this. I had not seen this kids father since i went to town on him in the sentencing hearing, and he thinks its a good idea to send his kid to my school. I have to face the possibility of bumping into his father in the car park, parent teacher meetings and any other possible places. The problem is exacerbated by the fact the child has a long history of severe behavioural issues, which i wont go into details as i want to protect identities. My school have already said that they will protect me in anyway possible, and have already put a plan in place. They will also pay for counselling which I’ve never had but i feel i need.
I am so sorry about all of this. I honestly don't think I could do it. I am so sorry. That is a tough one.